In the End: Chestnut's Choice

(It starts with one)

One thing I don't know why

It doesn’t even matter how hard you try

Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme

To explain in due time

All I know

time is a valuable thing

Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings

Watch it count down to the end of the day

The clock ticks life away

It’s so unreal

Didn’t look out below

Watch the time go right out the window

Trying to hold on but didn’t even know

Wasted it all just to

Watch you go

"Icefrost... no..." Chestnut's voice faltered with pain and anguish as he stared into the cold blue eyes of the beautiful white ShadowClan she-cat, which had once seemed so warm and loving. Icefrost flicked her tail and twitched her ears. "Forget it, Chesnut. You've done nothing for me. You're just like your brother - Forestsun. Except he never did fall in love - and especially not a she-cat with brains. Everyone in ShadowClan has heard about that pathetic loner." She spat Forestsun's name out like an ugly word. "All you do is dream, and you never see anything. I was using you."

I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart

What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard

And got so far

But in the end

It doesn't even matter

"Why?" Chestnut whispered. "I love you. We . . . we're in love! We were going to have a future, kits, run away together- we were so far! I tried!" His dark reddish pelt shook with disbelief. Icefrost regarded him, her frozen heart untouched. "No. There once was a time where I may have loved you. I was completely wrong. You thought we were going to have kits and a future. I was having fun."

I had to fall

To lose it all

But in the end

It doesn't even matter

Chestnut felt liquid ice and then hot molten course through his veins. Physical pain lanced through him, and he breathed heavily, the earth waving under him. He had trusted her. Loved her. She was the only thing that he thought about. And. . . he was certain she had loved him... but it was all a lie. Icefrost laughed giddily. "I suppose this is the end, isn't it, darling?" Chestnut looked at this strange white she-cat. "Oh, it will never be over," he whispered, and then walked away into the night, away from his love.

One thing, I don’t know why

It doesn’t even matter how hard you try

Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme

To remind myself how

I tried so hard

In spite of the way you were mocking me

Acting like I was part of your property

Remembering all the times you fought with me

I’m surprised it got so (far)

Things aren’t the way they were before

You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore

Not that you knew me back then

But it all comes back to me

In the end

Icefrost had always teased him. . . in the last six moons or so, it had become more hurtful, but Chestnut had thought nothing of it. As he lay in the cold straw of the abandoned Twoleg shack, it began to rain. Water poured through the cracks in the wooden ceiling and drenched Chestnut - but he couldn't feel anything, except for pain. He was Forestsun's younger brother of another litter, the adopted son of Natalie. . . who had taken him in, moaning and bloody, after his father and sister's latest, most violent attack, at the age of a new Clan warrior. They kept him prisoner.

You kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart

What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard

And got so far

But in the end

It doesn’t even matter

His sister, Banshee-Mary. As in the Twoleg terror. Her mind was twisted and malignant, like a deadly, uncureable disease. Chestnut's parents had posioned her mind with lies and terrible things about Forestsun, the disowned, runaway member of the family. Never again would they name their kin with a Clan name. Chestnut had actually been called Dagger before Natalie renamed him. Natalie had healed Chestnut's wounds, but never fully his heart, until her death. Icefrost had pieced it back together again, and she herself had ripped apart the strong threads that kept Chestnut sane.

I had to fall

To lose it all

But in the end

It doesn’t even matter

Chesnut clamped his jaws shut from crying out. He imagined Natalie's witty voice, thick with scorn, as she scolded him wisely. "Chestnut, she broke your heart. It will matter now, but once you gain vengance, it won't matter." His life, like his brother's before him, was a wreck. Chestnut would never heal again. There was nothing that life offered him anymore. But Icefrost deserved the treatement she had showed to Chesnut.

He began to plan.

I've put my trust in you

Pushed as far as I can go

For all this

There’s only one thing you should know

I've put my trust in you

Pushed as far as I can go

For all this

There’s only one thing you should know

I tried so hard

And got so far

But in the end

It doesn’t even matter

"Chestnut, no, please, I'm sorry!" Icefur's pleading voice screeched through the night, and Chestnut slammed his paw down to her windpipe, cutting her off effectively. "No." rasped Chesnut, swishing his long tail. Blood coated his claws and pelt, his ribs sticking out of his thin yet strong frame. "You took everything away from me. You'll never hunt with your Clan again. You will hunt in darkness for eternity. They will find you dead, killed by one who loved you, while out for a night hunt." Icefrost looked up at Chestnut looming above her, claws ready to tear through her soft pink belly. "Very well," she whispered. "And no longer will you be favored by the ones above, but by your violent kin." Chestnut grinned maliciously and sliced open her stomach, entrails spilling, as she moaned and fell silent, eyes glazed with defiance.

I had to fall

To lose it all

But in the end

It doesn’t even matter

"Welcome back, Dagger." Dagger's red eyes gleamed as he knelt by his father, sister, and mother. "You're back."