Are They Battle Scars?

Changes
When you try your best but you don't succeed

When you get what you want but not what you need

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse...

As kits we were closer than friends, more like sisters. Nightkit and I were the only kits in the nursery until Cinnamonkit was born. We let her into our group and played with her. But Nightkit and I were always together, when we were old enough to eat fresh-kill we shared it and we would sleep in the same nest when our mothers let us.

As apprentices, the friendship stayed, maybe even became more tight. Nightpaw and I slept side by side and trained together. I knew all her moves and she knew mine. I knew the way she always flicked her tail while hunting. She knew the way my ears flicked when I was fighting. Cinnamonpaw again mucked about with us but we were still so close.

But now, we are warriors. We are now Nightslash and Daydream. Cinnamonpaw is now Cinnamonfur. Our ceremonies were all at the same time for Cinnamonpaw was very good at everything. I like Cinnamonfur, she is very funny. I'd even go as far as saying that I like her more than Nightslash...

Since we became warriors, Nightslash is more distant. She doesn't seem to like me anymore and she's started to swear quite badly. Not just "mousebrain" and stuff similar, but things so bad that you've never heard of them. I've confided in Cinnamonfur and my other friend Dragonstorm of course and they both say I should tell someone. But I can't! Nightslash has such bad mood swings and lashes out with her fierce temper a lot.

I don't sleep next to her now. We're on opposite sides of the den. I have Cinnamonfur and Dragonstorm but Nightslash has no one. I feel so bad but I cannot do anything without the fear of being snapped at. I'm a total coward. I said this to Cinnamonfur when we were hunting yesterday.

"What?" she said to me, "No you are not! Who fought off two loners single pawed?"

"Me," I replied, "But-"

"No buts!" Cinnamonfur covered my mouth with her tail, "Come on, we've caught two squirrels and a rabbit. Let's go home."

I nodded and picked up my rabbit. Walking home, I was so distracted that I almost walked into a tree. But then, as my name suggests, I am always in a daydream so I often do things like that, sometimes I actually do walk into trees. I'm very clumsy.

Almost as soon as we got back to camp, Cinnamonfur was sent off on a patrol. Nightslash was on the patrol, my used-to-be best friend. For moons, she had been acting distracted, barely speaking or eating. She was very thin, her black pelt clung to her bones which gave her a scary look. She followed Cinnamonfur out of the camp and into the forest.

I was left to clean out the nursery, an apprentice's job. But I did not mind. There were new kits and I loved kits. Soulkit and Featherkit pounced on my tail as I worked which was so annoying that I was releived to dump the stale moss, a job I'm not to keen on.

"Daydream!"

It was Cinnamonfur, calling me from the entrance to camp. She sounded worried.

I ran over, anxious to find out what was worrying her. "What's up?"

"Come hunting with me," she said, "What I need to say must be said away from any other cats."

Confused, I followed her until she came to the apprentice training area. Fresh blood was spilled on the mossy ground. "Cinnamonfur..." I said, my voice high-pitched.

"I think it is Nightslash's blood," she meowed, "She said she found a scent and walked off to follow it. When she got back, there was there was a wound on her side. It was covered in dried blood. One of her claws was too."

"Nightslash..." I whispered, "No...She wouldn't harm herself, would she?"

"I don't know," said Cinnamonfur, "But she could be."

-/\-/\-



I didn't want to believe what Cinnamonfur said, but she never lies. Today on the dawn patrol, I saw that she could be right.

Nightslash was also on the patrol. "Hey, I smell rabbit!" she said, sounding oddly happy. She bounded off into the trees. I followed and caught her in the act.

There stood my friend in the middle of a clearing. A paw was raised above her flank. Suddenly she raked a claw down her side, leaving blood everywhere. She started licking the wound until it stopped bleeding and was caked in dry blood. She forgot about her claw.

I turned and ran, sobbing. My friend, Nightslash was harming herself deliberately. Over the next moon I watched her and every day there was a new scar. She was weakening, I could tell. But I could do nothing, nothing to help her and neither could Cinnamonfur. We were watching our friend die.

-/\-/\-

''It may be a normal fanfic, just a little bit short and not very good. But it isn't.''

''This story has two possible endings, one right, one wrong. This story is based on a major crisis in my life right now. All the characters in this story are real, Daydream is me, Nightslash is a friend who is possibly doing what her character is and Cinnamonfur is my bestie. Dragonstorm is a lovely user on this wiki who is my agony aunt.''

''Daydream, Cinnamonfur and Dragonstorm don't know what to do. Neither do I. But I have done one of these endings, the right one. I just hope that Nighslash choses the right one.''

Ending One
And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

Could it be worse?

Cinnamonfur and I did nothing, we told no one. We were forced to watch our friend kill herself, bit by bit. Every day Nightslash became weaker and weaker until one day she went hunting alone. We thought she'd be okay. We thought she'd just cut herself again and come back.

But the dawn patrol found something the next day. A trickle of blood led to a dead body, drained of its life blood.

Cinnamonfur and I blame ourselves. We mourned her, blaming ourselves. We lost someone who couldn't be replaced. We loved her.

Nightslash didn't come back.

Ending Two
Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

<p style="text-align:center;">And I will try to fix you.

We told someone. We told our mothers and the deputy. They talked to her. They helped her. Nightslash was angry, but no one told her that it was us. She didn't know who it was.

Every day Nightslash became stronger and stronger until she was once again like her old self. She has a mate now.

Cinnamonfur and I are proud of ourselves. We tried to fix her.

And it worked. Nightslash came back.

<p style="text-align:center;">The End.