Say it Right: Oaksoul's Regret

In the day, in the night,

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Say it right, say it all,

You either got it, or you don't

You either stand, or you fall

My blue gaze rakes over the sky. I wonder if it was worth hurting Silvercloud that badly until she kills herself.She wasn't my type- no she-cat is. I remember her light blue eyes, shocked and grief-filled, as I spit at her. I hate myself now. I realize what I am. A hate-filled, cold tom with a heart of stone. I had known her since kithood and we'd always been tight friends, but since I became a warrior and began to realize she was falling for me like all the other she-cats, I broke apart our friendship and stayed away from her. Did I love her?

When your will is broken

When it slips from your hands

When there's no time for joking,

There's a hole in the plan

What I hate is that she-cats fall over for me. Maybe it's because of my muscular black pelt, or my beautiful dark blue eyes. But Silvercloud was different. She loved me for who I was, not because of my looks. But I lashed out at her, because I assumed she only loved me because of my appearance. I growl at myself, shaking my head. I don't need a she-cat to live.

Oh, you don't mean nothing at all to me

No, you don't mean nothing at all to me

But you've got what it takes to set me free

Oh, you could mean everything to me

I was the kind of tom that you couldn't hold back - full of fire And that beautiful silver dappled she-cat was, too. A little calmer. Just perfect. All the other she-cats just wanted to contain me, like a kittypet with a Twoleg. To them, I was just a thing they could show off. Silvercloud wouldn't have done that.

I can't say that I'm not lost and at fault

I can't say that I don't love the light and the dark

I can't say that I don't know that I am alive

And I love what I feel

You tonight you tonight

Daisyheart comes up to me. She bats her eyes lovingly. Other she-cats watch enviously. "Oaksoul, can we talk?" she purrs. I ignore her, to show I'm not interested. She pursues. "Oaksoul... come with me tonight." I feel rage build up in me. I growl. "Go away, Daisyheart. Go away." The cream she-cat doesn't move. Her green eyes blaze with passion. "Oaksoul, please... come with me... I want you..." I've had enough. I rake my claws over her face. I feel the blood drip onto my claws. She screeches and pelts over to her friends. It was the 6th time she's tried to convince me to be her mate. I just want Silvercloud. But I didn't at first. So I'm stuck in a camp with a bunch of fawning she-cats.

Oh, you don't mean nothing at all to me

No, you don't mean nothing at all to me

But you've got what it takes to set me free

Oh, you could mean everything to me

We could have run away from the clan together. She wouldn't have minded, as long as I was with her. She meant everything to me. Spottedflower nervously makes her way toward me. Her blue eyes are filled with hope that I might fall for her. I snarl. She quickly dashes back to the ferns. The tortoiseshell had recently been made a warrior.

From my hands I can give you, something that I made

From my mouth I can sing you another brick that I laid

From my soul I can show you a place, *StarClan knows

You should know the space is holy

Do you really want to go?

I'm running away. Silvercloud will stay with me, always.

 * Note: Cats don't know about God, so I changed it to StarClan.